Happy Father's Day

Happy Father's Day to all those dads I know: both my Grandpa's, my dad, Brent, Cory, Rob Lamb, Vaughn, and my friends that have taken the plunge: Nych, Rob, Christian, and Bret.

Vacation?

Alright so here's the non-awkward blog I agreed to last time.

I am ready for a vacation. Not just a short trip to Vegas or camping close by, but a get on plane and go somewhere new type of trip. This doesn't mean I can afford it but it has been forever since I have done this. As in 5 years. So I have been looking and I think I am going to Tyra nd go to Chicago in July or maybe Denver. Both instances would be around the premise of going to a Cubs game. I would prefer to go to Wrigley field in Chicago but if due to money and timing I would be okay with going to Coord field in Denver. So! I will start trying to figure out how to go do that. Unfortunately that means taking time off work which I hate doing for many reasons but I guess it's tme to suck it up and go.

Also I think I want to take a road trip. I was thinking of going to Arizona, and visit Steve. Maybe go camping at Havasupai falls. But that is yet to be seen.

All I know is that I am ready to go on a trip. And soon.

Some thanks

I just wanted to write real quick and say a few thanks before I go to bed,

-Thank you to my Mom and Brent, I know I haven't been the wisest child or easiest to deal with but you both have been ever helpful and supportive no matter what. I know you guys care and I love you both for how much you have done and continue to do for me.

-Cory and Melissa thank you guys for being there, where?, just there. Whether that's at your house, in Vegas, a restaurant, Mary Jo's house, or jut out and about you both have been so willing to let me tag along and just try and relax or get away for a bit. Whether that's been just chatting with Melissa in the living room or going to Scheel's with Cory; it's always nice to be able to just hang out.

-Brylee and Ellie, for just being them (not the moody/grumpy/yelling/screaming side) but the cute, loving, fun, and playful side that they usually are. Just makes me feel loved.

-Alexa as a little sister you are squeaky and hyper energetic. But I love it, she fun to just talk to and play with. I enjoy so much being an older brother to you.

-Tyler and Ashley, despite the fact I don't see you guys much I am glad of the times we have hung out. I know we have our differences but who doesn't. You are both fantastic and a great example to someone like me who may not make the best choices, that things can always go better. Thank you.

-Derek, we go fishing, and to wing nuts, and to movies, and church (sometimes), and to the ranch, and BBQ's, and disc golfing, and other stuff. You have become a great friend and a ton of help at the dark times. Thank you.

-Chris and Kailey (Quinn included) you guys are amazing friends and another wonderful example of the simple joys in life. I love spending time with you guys and getting to see you three grow as a family. It makes me happy. Thanks for letting me being you dinner (or buy it for you). 

-Rob and Jocelyn you have both made life better for me in our neighborhood. I like being able to walk across the street and say hi, or see Logan out in the grass with the dogs, I am thankful you have both helped keep me sane over the years and help me get back closer to family. You three really are awesome.

Now I know there is a ton more people to thank, like Jared and Randilyn, Lucy, extended family, and especially Vaughn and Amy. I really hope you guys know I love you all and am grateful for everything you have all done for me. But I am falling asleep and I was told recently I needed to post so here it is, a quick write up of the things that have been on my mind.

Any who..... Time for bed, I'll make a less awkward post sometime soon.

Waiting to spend all my money

I'm a little bugged, I thought that my old work would let me know about problems if they saw them but I guess I was wrong. I sit here at Rocky's in Spanish Fork waiting for them to tell me how much I have to spend to fix my fuel leak that my old manager forgot to tell me about two weeks ago. So now it looks as though the money I was saving now goes to this. Oh the joys of owning a vehicle. Along that note, my legs KILL from riding a bike to work and back last night. It's been forever since I last rode a bike, and I can and will be feeling that for days.

Oh and there we have it, $540 to fix it. Joy. Oh and what shows up while I'm waiting to hear? An email informing me my insurance premiums are going up. Fantastic. Gotta love good days like this.

But I can't complain, I have had some great past couple of months, a bad day was bound to show up. It'll pass soon enough. Though it looks as though I will be spending a lot more time at home...for free.

So not much else going on, still trying to revive my yard, working over night, a bit of Geocaching to start the summer, and the thought of maybe going on a date. But we'll see what happens as the summer moves along. Hopefully I can do a BBQ sometime soon, bring everybody out to enjoy my crappy yard.

.

.

.sorry not the most compelling post but its a post none the less

3-D

I was kinda excited today, I had a date for the first time in a very long time and was looking forward to it. I cut my hair, shaved, got all cleaned up, put on my nice clothes, and no joke 2 minutes before I go to leave the house I get a call. Yup guess who just bailed, ... My date. Now don't get me wrong I can't hold it against her, she needed to help family. But I am just bummed, I was excited for this, and this was the second or third time we had rescheduled.
BUT, I was not to let this ruin my night....too horribly. I went on my date anyways...alone...as one does. I sauntered into the restaurant, took my seat, had a meal (not the best but I didn't have to cook or clean it so I can't complain), left and headed to the movie theater, and there I proceeded to enjoy a movie (Jurassic Park in 3D) all by my lonesome.
And yes, it was as lonely as it sounds. But I have grown accustomed to this and we'll all in all the worst thing I could really complain about if I really wanted to, is the blister on my hand from yard work today. Tough crying about it on the Internet isn't going to help it so I won't.
That's really all I got, that is the excitement if my life.

Summer-time

I want to write, I just have nothing to write about.

The end

Greatest ever

This past Tuesday was probably the greatest day I have had,.....EVER. Now normally I would want to keep this all to my self and tell no one. Thinking that it's not anybody's but my own business but I have found that I want to tell everyone I see, even random strangers that I have never seen before.
Last week on Saturday, the 16th, I got an email from Amy telling me they would be in town and she was asking me if I would like to meet up with them and meet Olivia. I wasn't sure what to say, I had never seen her before. Granted for the past 2 1/2 years they have sent me pictures and updates, but an actual face to face meeting with her! I didn't know what to say so I ignored the email for a while just so that I could think. My first thought was "No! No way.", I was nervous what I may feel and didn't want things to go badly. After talking with my mom about it and being kicked into the right frame of mind about it I decided it would be a good thing. So I emailed her back and told her yes, after a few more emails we set up a meeting time and place, Tuesday at 4:30.
I did not sleep for three nights thinking about this. I gradually go more and more nervous the closer the time came. Then Tuesday was here, I tried to work and keep my mind off of it, but work flew by and I still can't remember what I did that night. Classes came, I zoned out, the teachers spoke I had no idea what they said. Then I had to wait, 5 hours until the meeting. I sat in the hall at school, slowly the hours ticked by, despite my best efforts to calm down my nervousness grew. My shaking was worse, my mouth constantly dry, I had to keep running to a water fountain to fill my water bottle and consequently ... the bathroom also. 3:30, I had one hour, I left campus so that I would not be late. I got to our meeting place early but that was okay, I knew I would so it didn't bother me. Finally after days of waiting, it was 4:30. My mother was late but that was okay I worked up the courage to meet them on my own. Shakily I walked around the corner in the building to where we were supposed to meet and.....no one was there. I panicked, I started searching my phone, scrolling through all the emails. Was I in the right place? Was I so late they left? Am I hours early? Did something happen? CRAP!! What is going on, I paced circles. I couldn't handle it. I went from insanely nervous to hopelessly scared.
Then my mom and Brent showed up, they calmed me down, and we sat and waited. After a couple minutes I looked up and the cutest little family of two small girls followed by their parents walked around the corner. My stomach hit the floor, I thought I was nervous before, that was nothing. I couldn't move. Even if I could I felt I was going to shake so badly I wouldn't be able to walk straight. My mother gently took my hand and led me forward. I was frightened beyond belief. What if I do something dumb? What if she doesn't want to see me? What if I scare her? What if she cries? I couldn't take that, I couldn't handle being rejected like that. Every step my heart beat faster, it has to pop eventually, I was going drop with heart failure before we even got close. But then, we were there. Right next to Vaughn and Amy. And there she was, all blonde pig tails and bright blue eyes, with a smile that took my heart from 100 m.p.h. to frozen in an instant. She was beautiful. I couldn't do anything but watch her run with excitement. And I smiled. I couldn't stop smiling. The more she smiled the more I did. I didn't care what else happened, this was perfect. We all walked into the little play area to sit on the benches and watch Olivia and her sister run and play. Going up and down the slide, with intent to use it until it broke. Her squeaky little voice rising up from all around us as she ran was like music in the air. Everyone who heard it became happier by the second. At least I did.
They continued to run and play, my mother, Brent, Amy and Vaughn all sat chatting. I couldn't focus on the conversation. Not possible, I was too distracted watching the little ball of energy play. I got up and walked around, Olivia sat down on a little plastic rabbit pretending to ride it. Noises came from the other side of the building, echoing down the halls. Olivia stopped, head perked up, she looked at me with those huge eyes, "Dogs!" she exclaimed with excitement. She spoke to ME, I didn't know what to do, I was lost. Then before I knew it she had sucked me in. Pulling me around, making me go down the slide I was 50 times too big for, jumping the river laid into the carpet, finding and yelling at all the "sharks" in said river. I was in heaven.
I couldn't believe where I was and what I was doing. I LOVED IT!! We played and played. Finally as her and her older sister began to wear out, we began to take some pictures. Then the most wonderful thing happened, Amy asked me, "Would you like to hold her? Just over there so the lighting is better." I wanted to cry, I get to hold her. So I picked her up, light as a feather, I swung her up onto my hip and looked directly into those stunning blue eyes. My heart melted. We looked at the camera and smiled, but as we did a little rabbit she was given stuck me in the mouth. I laughed and she looked at me, I told her she was trying to make me eat the rabbit and she laughed. I couldn't help it, I laughed harder, so did she. We stood there face to face laughing back and forth as she tried to put a rabbit in my mouth.
It was time for them to leave, I asked Olivia before I put her down, can I have a hug. And as unselfishly and sweetly as any child does, she said yes and threw her arms around my neck. Perfect. With tears of joy in my eyes I set her down, said my goodbyes to the rest of her wonderful little family and knew, with out any doubt that she was happy. That she was with her true family, being raised by a loving mother and father, with a sister that also loves her.
I am so happy I made the choice to go see her. I feel so much happier about everything in life. I am so glad I got to be reassured of the choice to let her go. I am so grateful for Vaughn and Amy.