What changes can 17 years bring?
Everything is seemingly different, the time, the faces, the places, the daily routine; but on some days it doesn't matter. Some days the feelings are the same. They may not manifest like they have in the past but they are there.
Despite what we do and what we say the past 17 years have been something no one could have predicted or planned for. The underlying tone of the past years is one we all didn't ask for, or definitely want.
With out our consent the one event has shaped our lives, changed us for ever and made us rethink what we do and why we do it. Made us realize we can never completely control our future. At times we just have to hold on tight, grit our teeth and hope the rough parts are worth it.
..
..
Though it may not be said or even felt at times I have to say I love my family. I am grateful for everything they have done for not only me but for each other, especially in the past 17 years.
Thank you for everything.
Thursday, January 5, 2012
Sunday, January 1, 2012
Not very many people read anyway..
You know I have realized, ever since blogger changed their dashboard, no body really reads this blog. I don't know why I have it still or even why I write any more. But wait! I do it to vent, to blow off steam and to say things I want to say that I know nobody will read and even if they do I can ignore people's comments about it.
So with that being said, I am tired. I am sick of how life has turned out. Every time I have gotten a chance to be happy and have a better life I have thrown it away and in turn I make stupid mistakes over and over and over again. I have nothing to show for my 26 years I have been around. Well nothing to be proud of. I am sick of making the same mistakes over and over again and I want it to stop.
I need a break from EVERYTHING. I want to just leave and push everything to the side and do nothing but be happy and do what I WANT for a couple days.
And another thing, I miss her. Yeah if you know anything of the past year you will know who I am talking about. And Mom and Brent don't call and ask about it cause I don't want to talk about it. I made stupid choices and though I know she is happier than ever and I am glad for that, I am miserable. I want to just run far far away and restart life. Some where new, a place I don't know anybody. I would love that.
I am just tired and depressed with life, I want to be happy I just don't know how.
So with that being said, I am tired. I am sick of how life has turned out. Every time I have gotten a chance to be happy and have a better life I have thrown it away and in turn I make stupid mistakes over and over and over again. I have nothing to show for my 26 years I have been around. Well nothing to be proud of. I am sick of making the same mistakes over and over again and I want it to stop.
I need a break from EVERYTHING. I want to just leave and push everything to the side and do nothing but be happy and do what I WANT for a couple days.
And another thing, I miss her. Yeah if you know anything of the past year you will know who I am talking about. And Mom and Brent don't call and ask about it cause I don't want to talk about it. I made stupid choices and though I know she is happier than ever and I am glad for that, I am miserable. I want to just run far far away and restart life. Some where new, a place I don't know anybody. I would love that.
I am just tired and depressed with life, I want to be happy I just don't know how.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)